Thursday, February 7, 2008

I don't know about this



I don't have anything really to say, but I know I need to write something for my own sanity.
Sometimes things seem harder than they probably are. Not every day was meant to be happy. I guess if we didn't have sad days, we wouldn't appreciate the really good ones.
I am tired of being a responsible-ish adult. I feel like I'm not really good at it, that no one cares, and that I'm failing. Its hard trying to do all the right things in your head, not knowing that you're making mistakes, and then realizing you were wrong, having to apologize, not knowing still how you could have corrected the situation at the time. My feelings get even more hurt when I had full intention of doing the right thing to begin with. Now, I realize I'm not perfect, that some of this is just part of learning, but now more than ever, I just want to run from all the situations I feel I'm not ready to deal with, and then I think, GROW UP, its just not that big of a deal.
I'll probably spend the rest of the day, about my chores, mulling over everything some more. Hopefully by the end, I'll gather up my courage and just go on.

1 comment:

Jer + Lu said...

Tough times. Hang in there. Life has its wonderful days of sunshine too :) Times like these I like to sit back and watch a good show (One Tree Hill-online at www.cwtv.com) or read a good book (currently 19 Minutes by Jodi Picoult) and enjoy some non-real-life drama.